Thursday, January 7, 2010

...may be divine intervention

Dodging sound waves from making sense to my ear drums and using opacity of objects to their best use…when around the TV, has sub-consciously been my routine all my life. To all and sundry, who might wonder what the MsWord abuser is up to now, let me reveal that small introspections are leading to self discovery…or lunacy.
In either case, the abuse continues. 

When I was watching a movie, with absolutely no horror scenes, no creepy reptiles or awkward love making scenes, I found myself hiding from seeing the main character getting a solid dosage of public humiliation in the movie. I even shut my ears to near permanent impairment to not be able to listen to the embarrassment the character faced. I missed out the whole movie eventually as, somehow; embarrassment was the central theme of the movie.

I remember I did exactly this when unknown guests came to our house and I was warranted to meet n greet them. The restroom seemed safer than a BSF bunker then. I did it when a friend choked in front of hundreds during an elocution contest. Closed my eyes and prayed that next 24 hours (2 hours of my friend’s being a laughing stock and the 22 hours of recovery time) could pass in a moment. I still do it during informal gatherings when people are singled out and asked to sing, dance, and crack a joke or the like.

Never did it occur to me that I was…err…am being the biggest escapist in human history. Because, I can’t stand fictional characters being traumatized in a story, let alone the idea of me trying out anything even remotely adventurous and eventually being laughed at.

I am obsessed with my comfort zone. I really could use some mean people in my life who would challenge me out of it. Some really bad people.

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